How time flies, right?

Just when you think (hope) October would last forever, we’re already 1/6th of the way through November! You know, also known as that time of year when you blink – it’s Thanksgiving. Then walk downstairs – it’s Christmas. Lay down for a quick nap – HELLO, PRESIDENTS’ DAY MATTRESS DEALS.

Insanity, I’m telling you.

But with the month now behind us, that also means our annual 31 for 31 horror movie fest is over. And for as tré tradge as that always is, it’s fun gathering round after the fact to debrief, reminisce & game plan for next year. Especially since this past round is going to be a pretty hard one to beat!

Between work, a little sleep & counting the days until My Chem announces their inevitable REUNION WORLD TOUR – everyone’s busy. So it’s no secret that watching 31 movies in 31 days is always a pretty tall order. But this by FAR is the best we’ve ever done! Of course, it’s not like we went in order, but any which way you put it, nothing can take away from the ghoulish gold that was this year’s selections.

Let’s review …

THE MOST COUNTERINTUITIVE: SAW II & III

Last year’s marathon featured the first godfather of torture porn installment: SAW. So it only made sense that we keep rolling with the pitiless punches, considering there’s a whole lot more to this series than the average public often assumes.

If you can get over the layers of notoriously gory shock value, there’s a seriously interesting message behind the premise as a whole. Sure, you have a dude talking through a little clown puppet on a tricycle – but think of him like…an ethical boogie man. Here to put you into check when (& how) you least suspect it through some pretty gnarly lessons of gratitude and perspective. Which, even though we’re still having a few nightmares about that needle pit, there’s definitely something to be said for the chill-filled thought exercise.

And also, that soundtrack.

THE GUILTY PLEASURE: HELL HOUSE, LLC II & III

Yet another rendition of the classic “found footage” style, the Hell House, LLC series is far from the most quality of cinematic experiences – but it is super, SUPER fun.

All in all where these three low-budget beauties legit differ from the block-busting franchises that came before them is cohesion. Even though the jury’s still out on whether it was all actually calculated from the start, the second & third editions convincingly build upon the debut film just as much as they do each other. Which is a relatively noble feat – especially in the world of horror.

So whenever in the mood for something fun & tense, yet ominous with a few nightmare-inducing clowns to boot, then the Hell House, LLC trilogy totally has you covered.

THE MOST UNDERRATED: TUCKER & DALE VS. EVIL

They always say that horror & comedy are two sides of the same coin. So when it works it ~works~, as proven by two well-intentioned Hillbillies just trying to save some college kid lives.

Featuring all the people you always recognize but never remember from what, Tucker & Dale vs. Evil was definitely an unexpected smash hit of the roster. It’s loaded with tons of literally laugh out loud moments, plus an ending that guarantees all the feels. And also now that we think about it, basically the same life lessons you learned from the Muppets. Just with a slightly darker, more PBR-friendly backdrop.

THE SMARTEST: SCREAM

The second after we finished the first Scream, I asked Kevin why I hadn’t seen this until NOW. His answer: you have to have seen a hefty dose of horror before fully appreciating the meta mastery of the franchise.

But seriously. Claiming its fame by reviving slasher vibes from the dead, Scream is obviously so much more than just the inspiration behind one of the best episodes of Boy Meets World ever. With an entire plot based around citing troupes of the genre that also happens to be the very world they live within, it makes for a super smart, self-aware & clever take on a sub-genre that was on a now-surprising verge of collapse.

In fact, it was SO great that we even replaced one of the originally slotted movies with Scream 2 – because love. And love to psycho, baby Timothy Olyphant.

THE MOST…JUST NO: CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST

I mean, need we say more? Within the grindhouse scene, pretty much everyone’s heard of Cannibal Holocaust in some shape or form. So for all the infamously graphic, anthro-audacity that comes along with the territory, it had to make its debut on the list at some point. And it did – and we’re over it.

Sure, deeper message totally gotten. But after about the fifth brutal animal slaying & 20-minute playing out of events that could have been condensed into about three, been there done that & now we’re happy to move on.

LASTLY, THE BIGGEST SURPRISE: ANACONDA

And not in a bad way!

All we’re saying is when would you have ever expected to see Ice Cube, J-Lo and Owen Wilson converge on the same screen? And in a snake-hunting, Amazonian-safari-cruising, thoroughly ’90s horror movie, no less.

Ahh, what a year. Now time to spill what horror flicks are running faves in your book!

xxAA